Sunday, December 19, 2010

What a REAL Blogger Looks Like

OK, well, maybe not actual looks....

Here's the thing. I read a stupendous post by Jim of the Busy Dad Blog, titled My Middle Name. (There are about a dozen things that I could say about the post, and some day I might. I put it in the folder that I put articles that I want to write a response to.) I shared it on Facebook. I left a comment. At current count there are 81 comments on that post.

Go read that post. You will be blown away, 18 ways from Sunday. Go.


81? Really? I think it takes me a full 2 or 3 months to get to 81 comments total.

Jim is a stand up guy. I met him once, at BlogHer Chicago '09, I think. I'm certain that he doesn't remember me.

Oh. Back to that comment that I left? He emailed me a response. I've never left him a comment before. I don't read him regularly. We're not friends that email back and forth. I'm not Dooce, for crying out loud.

He responded to me. That's what a REAL blogger looks like.

At the risk of sounding like a nut-job, yes, I'm gushing. Busy Dad guy emailed me.

Note to other big-name bloggers that don't have "time" to respond to people? You can suck it. Jim just made my reader and you're getting dropped.

Thanks, Jim. You just made my day, and considering the day I've had? That's somethin'.
Headless Mom


Ramblin' Red said...

I had the same kind of feeling when Mir e-mailed me last month re: a comment I made on her post about over-sharing. I was blog-struck!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

That is awesome and very special that he took the time to answer you. I hope the other big guys hear you!

BusyDad said...


I would like to quote what a real "big time blogger" said to me when we first exchanged emails and I was dumbstruck.

"I'm just a girl with a website, just like you're just a guy with a website."

That was Tanis, of RedneckMommy fame. In the end, we are all people who like to overshare on the internet. That is what bonds us. My worth, your worth and even Dooce's worth as a person is not determined by how much traffic we get. It's by the people we are and how we relate to the people on the other side of our screens. Period.

Honestly, I don't always reply to comments. However, if I decide I'm not replying to comments (mostly when I am simply too busy with my job, the kids,cooking dinner etc), I don't reply to anyone. I won't pick and choose the "big" people to reply to. But this post was important to me, as were the comments that you and everyone else left. This post was an opportunity for me to connect in a deeper way with everyone. That warranted a reply. I'm killing myself replying to all the comments, and I haven't finished yet because I'm at the office, but this time, it's worth every email I type out.

Please say hi to me next time you see me. I may not remember you specifically, but I was probably buzzed ;)

Thanks for linking to my post and thank you for your thoughtful post. It means a lot to me. It really does (and makes me feel all famous and stuff).


kyooty said...

what I like about my commenters (sp? really? I can't spell that yet?) is that it feels like a conversation. If I wrote an article in a newspaper it would (back in the day) just be read and people would either talk amunst themselves or not you know? With blogging you get to hear the "inside" story sometimes! LOVE IT!

Jim did have a great post and he's at 90+ comments

Headless Mom said...

@Jim- I *know* those things. I've been doing this for over 3 years. I guess my point should have been that you're someone who's doing this right. You replied to me when I commented on something that you felt deeply about. There are some bloggers that have never replied to me, whether on deeply important posts or silly ones. To me, blogging is about connection and conversation and if I never get a reply from someone then it's obvious that they are writing a magazine article, not a blog that "welcomes" comments. I don't reply to every comment, either, but if someone takes the time to comment I try to at least get over to their blog and leave a comment, or somehow acknowledge their visit.

I'm not saying any of this as sour grapes, or as a girly "squee" to your email. I really just love the conversation of blogging. That's why I started blogging in the first place, and I don't remember a time that anyone with that many comments on a post responded to me. That's why I 'gushed' about this, because you made me feel like my comment was important.

Yes, Tanis is wise, and damn funny, too! (Maybe that's who you were with when we met?)

BusyDad said...

@headless mom - know what's funny? When I started my blog, I had never read a single blog. I didn't really know what they were. I just knew my kid did funny stuff and I should write it down so I wouldn't forget. And maybe some people would read it and get a kick out of it along the way. So, I started out writing it like a magazine article, never expecting any dialogue. What happened next amazed me... people started commenting and all of a sudden I realized that blogging was a living, breathing thing! And this was 100x better than anything I had ever expected it to be. 3+ years later, it still amazes me how blogging is simply people connecting with one another.

Like this. Glad we met (again) online!