Monday, October 3, 2016

nine years

I started this little thing 9 years ago, almost to the day. October first, if memory serves.

I recently proved to myself that I hate F*cebook. Again. But yet.... I vow to do less of that and more of this. If I do that my blood pressure will go down, that is certain. Election years on social media are the worst. I learned that in '08. I never write about politics here except to say that I hate it. So there's that.

It's finally feeling like fall here in the desert southwest. Or California. Whatever. It seems that on or about October 1 every year the evenings finally get cool. Even though we might still run the AC during the hottest days, we can now count on cool evenings. We may not get seasons, per se, but I'll take cool evenings when I can.

The headless boys aren't so little anymore. My #1 is a junior in high school and #2 is a freshman at a different high school. Long story. Thank goodness #1 now drives! I'm getting visions of them being truly grown up and leaving and it is so so bittersweet. In my mind's eye they are still the little ones that bugged me for more legos and had toothy grins for baseball pictures but yet when I really look at them now I see young men that need to shave and are eating us out of house and home. Typical, I guess.

My girl has been married for three years now. So long ago are the days of watching Grey's together on a Thursday night or all sitting around the table for a Sunday family dinner. Our time now is much too short; but I suppose all parents say that of the ones that are flown. A husband, a home and a new life, all without us as daily fixtures. I'm happy for them. I love having a front row to what they are building for themselves. It gives me hope.

And us. We are inching up on 19 years, he and I. Next month. That means that we've been together for twenty. Twenty. It's hard to believe, really. Whether it's my age or feeling wistful, it really is true- the days are long but the years are short. They fly and all of a sudden you're looking at 50 much closer than you ever have and you realize that this life you have, that we built, is such a good life. Such happy days and triumphs that make the bad, sad ones bearable, if just barely. These people that God has gifted me with-the ones in my house, and those who started here and are gone, and the ones I started with, and the friends that we deem family: they are the ones that matter. The ones that lift us. The ones that make us go on when we'd rather disappear into a pint of ice cream. The ones we bend over backward to help even when we don't think there's any help left in us.

What a beautiful life it is, after all. Thanks for hanging around for nine of them. xo


Anonymous said...

I've not been here from the beginning, but I've always enjoyed reading your blog posts. And so glad to see where God has kept you safe in His loving hands, and continues to guide you. Blessings!
Nadine in CO

Kendra HeadlessMom said...

Thank you Nadine! It's nice to know I still have a few readers left!

Debby@Just Breathe said...

Welcome back. Beautiful post!

kyooty said...

Happy thanksgiving from Canada :) I'm glad you are still writing. IT's so very true about the time going by, the older boys here just went off to a movie together. Thankfully my baby is still only 11.