Not Only Mine

I wonder, is it only me? No, it's really not.

2016 has taken so many that we love.

We've mourned music greats from David Bowie, to Prince, to Glen Frey, among others. And actors from Alan Rickman to Abe Vigoda (for real this time!). And other beloved figures like Nancy Reagan, Harper Lee, Pat Conroy, and more.

Point being, it's been a year of national mourning. But not just in the public arena either.

Many of my friends have lost beloved pets. Missing our furry friends is heart-breaking. They fill a 'comforter' role in our lives that other things just can't fill.

But this is the thing:

To date, including myself, there are 11 women in my life that have lost our fathers this year.

Let that sink in, would you?

E.L.E.V.E.N.

Simple math, y'all. It's averaging one beloved daddy a month. Women from all stages of my life: elementary school, high school, college, blogging. And every time I open my computer, or answer the phone to hear of another one, my heart breaks all over again. For them, certainly, but for my other friends and also myself, all over again.

That's not counting the moms that have gone, darn it. Or the men that I know that have lost beloved parents.

If you've lost someone close to you, I am so so sorry. 2016 has been hard on you, too. Like I said yesterday, It's just such a heavy burden to bear. But please know that you are not alone. There are others out here that are bearing that burden, too, and would love to talk about it. We're going through the same things. Reach out when you need to. Pray. God knows how heavy this is.

"Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted" Matthew 5:4

It isn't just some mystical comfort that magically comes down from the clouds. God sends us people! Others that are going through just what we are can be such a comfort. One of my friends from high school lost her father not long after mine. I reached out to her privately and we have begun a months long conversation about this grieving process that ebbs and flows. In September we had a good cry over the beginning of the NFL season. Girls crying over football? Yup. We both would call and text our dads on Bronco's game days and their death leaves a 16+ week gap in our year of connecting with our dads.

God sent her to me because she knew EXACTLY how I would feel, when few others would. That is how God comforts the mourning.

Would you let Him comfort you? Cry out to Him. He understands and will send you what you need.

Edited to add: 12. 12 daddies. I just can't. But He can.

nine years

I started this little thing 9 years ago, almost to the day. October first, if memory serves.

I recently proved to myself that I hate F*cebook. Again. But yet.... I vow to do less of that and more of this. If I do that my blood pressure will go down, that is certain. Election years on social media are the worst. I learned that in '08. I never write about politics here except to say that I hate it. So there's that.

It's finally feeling like fall here in the desert southwest. Or California. Whatever. It seems that on or about October 1 every year the evenings finally get cool. Even though we might still run the AC during the hottest days, we can now count on cool evenings. We may not get seasons, per se, but I'll take cool evenings when I can.

The headless boys aren't so little anymore. My #1 is a junior in high school and #2 is a freshman at a different high school. Long story. Thank goodness #1 now drives! I'm getting visions of them being truly grown up and leaving and it is so so bittersweet. In my mind's eye they are still the little ones that bugged me for more legos and had toothy grins for baseball pictures but yet when I really look at them now I see young men that need to shave and are eating us out of house and home. Typical, I guess.

My girl has been married for three years now. So long ago are the days of watching Grey's together on a Thursday night or all sitting around the table for a Sunday family dinner. Our time now is much too short; but I suppose all parents say that of the ones that are flown. A husband, a home and a new life, all without us as daily fixtures. I'm happy for them. I love having a front row to what they are building for themselves. It gives me hope.

And us. We are inching up on 19 years, he and I. Next month. That means that we've been together for twenty. Twenty. It's hard to believe, really. Whether it's my age or feeling wistful, it really is true- the days are long but the years are short. They fly and all of a sudden you're looking at 50 much closer than you ever have and you realize that this life you have, that we built, is such a good life. Such happy days and triumphs that make the bad, sad ones bearable, if just barely. These people that God has gifted me with-the ones in my house, and those who started here and are gone, and the ones I started with, and the friends that we deem family: they are the ones that matter. The ones that lift us. The ones that make us go on when we'd rather disappear into a pint of ice cream. The ones we bend over backward to help even when we don't think there's any help left in us.

What a beautiful life it is, after all. Thanks for hanging around for nine of them. xo

The Cool Part of the Internet

Earlier tonight I was scrolling through Facebook and someone's avatar caught my eye. It was a picture of my sorority's badge. Huh. That's weird. OK, not really, considering today was our Founder's Day, but weird because it wasn't anyone I knew and our 1 mutual friend wasn't in our sorority.

So I sent her a message. I assumed that it would probably go to the "Other" mailbox. You know, where the creepers try to send you a million bucks and normal messages go to die? I had a reply in my inbox almost immediately! Turns out she was in a colony class the year that I traveled for the sorority so we have at least one other mutual friend. She's a blogger.  I think we messaged for at least 30 minutes. I bet if we got on the phone together we would talk for an hour before either one of us came up for air.

Meeting Michelle was all of the things that are right with the internet. Mutual friends and interests, plus being nice, equals good experiences all around.

Some days I love the internet.

I haven't had nearly enough of this lately.

Anyone wanna volunteer for a few shenanigans in the near future?

7 Years

I started this blog back in 2007. I've written many times about why I started it and why I continue-primarily because of the friendships that I've make over the years. Every friend I've made has taught me something. I think that is one of the best things about personal blogs- learning about someone's individual story. We're all the same in that we're human, we make mistakes, we learn, we love.

But YOUR story? That sweet one about how you met your husband? That one made me smile. The story about your toddler in the grocery store? I could really relate with that one. And OH.MY.GOSH. the post about your pet peeves? Spot on. Believe me when I say I cried with you when you wrote about your loss. My heart breaks with yours.

I have seven years. Many of you have lots and lots more. I guess I'm an adolescent in this blogging thing. I'm no longer looking to 'make something' out of this-that ship has sailed. My eyes are wide open and I realize that these friends of mine- You! You! and yes, you too- are the best reason for blogging ever.

Why I Continue Blogging... (part 2)

Nothing like starting a 2 part post and then dropping off the face of the earth. Sorry y'all. If you don't know what I'm talking about you can go and catch up by clicking here.

Connecting the dots to new friends with old connections. Yes, that's where I left off.

Every conference or event that I attend now I get to meet someone new. Sometimes that someone is a friend of a friend, sometimes just a stranger that I sit next to in a session. Occasionally you don't even have to be at an event to meet the people there.

"Huh? She's gone off the deep end with that one." I guess I'll have to explain.

My good friend Carmen was at an event in March and met the women there. During introductions, one of the other attendees mentioned that she lived in the same town as I do. Twitter intros ensued and a few weeks later I have a brand new blogging friend in my very own home town.

Meet Caryn of The Midlife Guru. Turns out that we have a few other mutual friends, were at the Blissdom conference at the same time last year, and have lots and lots in common. Who knew that a frozen yogurt meet-up would last for 1 1/2 hours with promises of other events and more yogurt?

This is what I love about blogging. Our blogs grow and change and bring us face to face with new friends that we would never have met otherwise. That's why I keep at it.

Why I started blogging... (part one)

My story, the one that is specific to me and when I started blogging is under my About tab. I stand by that, but here is the rest of the story....

The part that isn't there is the sense of belonging, the friendships and connections. Earlier in 2007 I had started reading blogs because of an article in a magazine. At the bottom of the page was a web address that changed my life. (And my free time, truth be told.) I visited that blog, and another and another, and I was hooked. Through the summer I started having a longing to join this community of moms that had an online life. But me? I was no writer. But that conference in Chicago? Man, I really wanted to go. 4 days away from my kids and household responsibilities sounded like heaven.

I started gingerly. My early blog posts are painful to read now. I hadn't found my voice, didn't yet know what to say, but I kept at it. And I kept it a secret. I was afraid of failing at making real friends online and having anything worthwhile to say. I didn't have a specialty, a passion, or a niche. But I kept at it. Reading and commenting with my silly blog name hoping to make some friends along the way.

Community is a funny thing. You start by standing on the fringes, smiling and interjecting to seem a part of the crowd, and little by little you're not on the fringes anymore. You're (read: I'm) certainly not in the center but there are so many around you that you can't see the fringes anymore. You've become a part of the group while you weren't even looking.

At my first BlogHer Conference in the summer of 2008, my goals were simple. Learn a little something, and meet (most of) the women that I read regularly. Looking back, I rocked those simple goals. The unexpected icing on the cake however, was that some of those women that I casually wanted to meet have now become some of my closest online and real life friends. It's crazy to think that I have known Carmen, Jennifer, Elizabeth, Michele, Gwendolyn, Casey, and Yvonne (among many, many others,) for seven years. As in life, I'm closer to some than others but seven years? Because I "wanted what they were having" and joined a circle of women writing about their lives online?

It's both simple and so, so complicated.

The making of the friends. That's what this life, online and off, is really all about, isn't it? After all these years that's what blogging was, and still is about. Connecting the dots to new friends with old connections.

To be continued.....

While the Cat's Away...

This is the week that I'm taking HB#1 to DC/NYC with his school. Well, the old school. Anyway, apparently Old Man Winter decided that we needed to stress a little because it looks like the DC area will be getting 4-8 inches of snow between now and tomorrow evening. Send up a prayer that our flights are not effected and we are able to arrive as planned. We will be doing ev.ry.thing. All by noon on Thursday, then heading up to NYC. I'm so excited about both cities. I've been to both but there are things that we'll be doing that I've never done.

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It's been a rough few weeks around here. Some close friends of ours found out at the end of February that their 11 year old son has cancer. My heart is broken. We're still in shock, I think, but doing our best to be available to the family to help in whatever capacity that they need. So many in our community have already stepped in to fill in the gaps with meals, rides for their other children, etc., the outpouring of support has been almost overwhelming. And the outpouring has certainly been beautiful. It's going to be a long haul, as the treatment plan is for about 12 months. While I'm away, would you please pray for my friend Ann, her son Peter, and their family? He finished his first round of chemo yesterday and is expected home later this afternoon.

Ann reads here if you would like to leave a message of support for her, Peter, and the family in the comments.

The blogging community is so supportive-I'm counting on you all to fill the gap this week while I'm gone!

A Vegas Overview-With Teenagers!

 I mentioned that we were heading to Vegas a few weeks ago, yes? We were meeting my lovely friend Shannon and her family. The weekend started with a road trip to the Hoover Dam on the Nevada/Arizona state line. I think I may have done this as a child but have zero recollection of it at all. It was really amazing. Did you know that the dam itself is not attached to the surrounding canyon walls at all? If you're ever in the area it is worth taking the long tour. I'm sure we'll be going back some time since, at the last minute, Headless Dad wasn't able to go.






On Saturday night we went to Bacio Restaurant in the Tropicana. Headless Dad and I discovered it last year on our weekend getaway and it is still delicious. We give it 4 stars!

 On Sunday morning we started on the south end of the strip at the Mandalay Bay Shark Reef Aquarium. The kids really loved it. As you can see, my HB#2 got to get his hands wet and touch the rays. It was a nice exhibit; the pace was perfect for a lazy Sunday morning. Even this old broad learned a few things!










One of my favorite things to see in Las Vegas is the lobby of the Bellagio hotel. Below is the ceiling near the check-in desk. Those are giant Murano Glass disks bolted to the ceiling, with lights behind them. Truly stunning.

 Even the tile floors in the Bellagio are a sight to see. Can you tell that this is an intricate mosiac? I just love it. Someday when I win the PowerBall I am going to have someone do this at my house. Anywhere will do: entry way, bathroom, back patio.... All of the above?











And of course, you haven't seen Vegas until you've seen the water show. It is spectacular day or night. (Click on the Bellagio website for a preview of what it looks like at night.)

 We visited the Paris hotel, a first time for me. Although we didn't see much of it, we did use the bathrooms here and if the rest of the hotel and casino is as detailed as the sinks? Definitely a place to return to and explore a little more. Shannon took her daughter up in the Eiffel Tower and said that the views were amazing!

We had walked the bulk of the day so by the time we hit Paris we were all pooped. The boys wanted to swim so we headed back to our hotel. After swimming we went out to grab dinner and fulfill another promise to the boys. A second ride on the roller coaster at NYNY. It really is a great coaster, but Shannon's 9yo daughter wasn't pleased the first time so she didn't go a second time. I cannot believe I didn't get a picture of this!!

Since it was an early night, the boys decided that "While in Vegas, do what Las Vegans do"... (or something like that.) They pulled out the playing cards, bought Tic Tacs to bet with, and played poker. Shannon and I loved hearing their laughter while we had a glass of wine.

It was such a fun weekend and it even got my #1's highest approval rating of: "Best Weekend Ever." I'll take it!

Thanks Shannon for suggesting this-Let's do it again soon!



If you'd like to follow Shannon's family adventures, check out her blog 100 Routes Across America.

Thankful and Blessed

On Monday as I was racing around the grocery store I got a text message. I was half tempted not to  read it since it seemed that I had hit the store at just the right moment when it wasn't a madhouse. I glanced down and saw that it was from my mother, so I slid the message open.

Hey, good news! No sign of cancer. Bad news, gallstones. Oh well. Nothing to do about that til there's a problem.

I dropped my phone and sobbed into my hands. No sign of cancer. Months of prayer, months of worry. No sign of cancer.

*****

I am so thankful for my dad beating this. For him staying strong and not giving up.
I am thankful for my mother, who is way more badass than she gives herself credit for. She has gotten through these last 11 months, rarely asking for help, and supporting my dad all the way. And with a grace that I'm not sure that she thinks she had.
I am thankful for my aunt, who in moving to Colorado, has brought new life into the home that they all share. Some of that life is four-foooted and furry, and it is good.
I am thankful for my daughter and her new husband being there and the new relationships that are forming, away from the relationships in the shadow of us, the parents. I am thankful for their faithfulness to God and how he is blessing them, abundantly, as they start their new life together.
I am thankful for my brother and his family who have been so supportive of our parents. And my nieces that bring  smiles to faces when they enter a room.

*****

I am thankful for my amazing husband. He works so hard for us and is so generous. I'm thankful that he loves me beyond measure, faults and all.
I am thankful for my #1 son. He is 14 today. He challenges me every day and I am a better human for those trials. He is musical and artistic and gentle and kind.
I am thankful for my #2 son. He makes me laugh and despite his stature is also gentle and kind.

*****

I am thankful for my husband's family. They have given me so much and stretched me to grow in places that I didn't know I needed growth. I'm thankful for the babies that we get to smooch on when we're together. Thankful for being able to guide nieces in some small way, sister-in-laws that welcome me in, and a brother-in-law that can be counted on.

*****

I am thankful for friends. Friends who, despite our busy schedules, can pick up right where we left off. Friends that open their homes to us. Friends that let me vent, knowing that I'm being irrational, and let me get it out anyway. Friends who I can let my guard down with. Friends who don't judge me for my foul mouth. Friends that know when a glass of wine isn't just a nice way to end the day, it's a necessity. Friends who trust me with the hard stuff. Friends who, despite the miles between us, answer text messages and will spill it to me by text so we remain relevant to each other. Friends who make coffee dates a priority, weekly. Friends that live in my computer yet still support me and my family every day.

And for you. You, the friends that come here, to read about my crazy yet average life. I am thankful for you too. Even the ones that don't often comment. Thank you for letting me tell my story to you.

*****

And last, but certainly not least, I am thankful for a God that sent his Son that we might have abundant life, beyond measure. Because without Jesus, none of this would be possible.

I wish for all of you to have such a full and happy and rich life. xoxo

Happy Birthday Carmen!

My wish for you is that your day is filled with sunshine, laughter, flowers, cocktails, and obedient children. ;-)

Love you, my friend, have a fantastic birthday!!

PS- I forgot who took this picture at Blissdom. Help a sister out?

Coffee

At the beginning of the school year us moms were chatting and decided to try to get together for coffee. Glad that our kids had gone back to school, we decided to treat ourselves.
 


That random treat has turned into my weekly therapy session!

Confession: I don't always buy coffee. HD grinds and brews a full pot every morning so there is usually more than enough for me to take my own. Instead of coffee I usually buy a granola/yogurt parfait, so yes, they still get my money. Sometimes.

We typically meet on Wednesday morning at 8:30, or more accurately 8:40. (We're not known for being punctual. Ahem.) What's 10 minutes among friends, right?

Over the 8 months that we've been meeting, we have discussed everything from kids, to husbands, the school, discipline, food, jewelery, and more.

It's usually just the 3 of us but we're not exclusive. Others try to meet us from time to time, and some stop to join in our chats. Husbands are welcome but only for a moment! This is our time, girl time, friend time.

I mentioned this in my ABC's post but it's true. In all of the years that I've lived here (almost 15!) this is the first group of pals that I've had locally and it feels really, really good. Yes, I've had other friends, and I know dozens of people, but having real friends is truly priceless.

Or, you know, worth a good cup of coffee.
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Nomads and Pizza

I know, I know. It's been a while. I really wish I was one of those bloggers that could just jump right in to posting again with wit and charm and grace. Instead you just get me, in all of my clumsy glory.

In spite of my house falling down around me it has been a good couple of weeks. Early last week we were host to the traveling Reints family. Britt, Jared, Devin, and Emma came to stay with us for a couple of days. It was so fun to catch up with their travels and introduce Headless Dad to another one of my non-freaky, completely normal internet friends. (That's a joke, y'all. He doesn't really get the whole internet thing too much. Of course Britt is normal, it's HD that is the abnormal one. Well, at least as far as social media is concerned.) The kids all got along great, and I hope that Britt and Jared were able to let their hair down a little and catch up on stuff after a busy week in Las Vegas/Lake Mead. If you haven't been following their journey, take some time to catch up, see where they're finding happiness this week, and see where their journey is taking them this spring. If you don't know already, they pulled into San Fransisco today so I'm sure there will be some fantastic things in store!

HD has finally had some scheduling luck so some projects at work that have been going on for a long time are finally getting finished. That meant that he was out of town Friday and Saturday. On one hand that stinks for obvious reasons, on the other hand it gave the boys and I a chance to do something that we don't often get to do. Go to the pizza joint. I'm not even kidding. If you've been reading here for very long you may have observed that HD is kind of a food snob. He's mostly a meat and potatoes guy with a little exotic flavor thrown in. Dude is extremely picky about his pizza. There are only one or 2 local places that he'll eat pizza from and that's not often. So, the kids and I called some friends, whose husbands were also working, and we took the plunge. The boys raided our change jar for quarters for the video game machines, got to hang out with other kids, and I got to have some 'girlfriend time'. It was lovely.

The good thing about having house guests is that my house is clean. I mean really clean. Like, cleaner than it's been since before the Great Flood of 2010, or maybe ever. Now, it's not perfect-remember, we have a torn out bathroom!, but it looks really nice and I'm feeling the effects. Those kooky people that say that having a clean house leads to a peaceful mind-set just might be on to something. I'm actually motivated to be all Fly-Lady and clean a little each day so that it stays this way.

And that thump you just heard? That was both of my parents falling over from shock all the way in Colorado.

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Aspen

Headless Dad called me this afternoon with news that one of his oldest and dearest friends was in town, and "HEY! I asked him over for dinner!" Which is fine, and I love Brian, but it totally threw my afternoon into a direction that I didn't anticipate.

(Side note: He's the guy that supplies the wreath in this post every year. Love that!)

Anyway, since I got totally side tracked you get Aspen trees instead of a real post. Taken this summer at my parent's house. See ya tomorrow!

I'm thinking that if I actually knew how to use a photo editing program, this could be an awesome shot.
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60

Forget me, go wish my IRL friend and bloggy pal, Debby of Just Breathe a happy 60th birthday!



Deb and I have been friends for 13 years and on the same bowling team for 12. She is the most compassionate woman I know.

If 60 and beyond is anything like her 59th year, then life beginning at 60 is just the half of it! Debby, have a wonderful day, a great time at Wicked in December, and the most joyful year of all. I love you, friend!
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Notes from the Past

Recently I was cleaning off my desk and found this:

Cute, right? The best part is the other side, though.

You might be able to read it if you click and enlarge but let me help you! (I copied the note exactly as it was written, circa 1982.)

Kendra, I am writing this card at 11:03 at night, so if it gets sloppy, please forgive me. I think its really stupid how this whole thing turned out and since we're both too stubbern (sp) to give in, I thought I would try this. For a while it seemed (to me anyway) that we were getting to be really close, so I can't see us throing (sp) that friendship out. This might be sounding real [stupid], but I can't think of good words at 11:11 at night. I hope with this card I have broken the ice and now maybe we can talk about it soom. Well I'm running out of room, so I'd better go. Love always, Kelly W/B please!

I wish I knew what we were fighting about that week. Some MAJOR Jr. High drama, obviously. I love it though, because here I am, about 30 years later, smiling.  Smiling because whatever it was, wasn't strong enough to break up our friendship in the long term. This is the girl that I spent every Saturday of Jr. High with on the slopes of Winter Park, countless hours listening to the Go Go's and the Waitresses, practicing cheer routines, and dissecting our latest crush. Oh my, you should see the notes about the boys! (Which, I actually have a few of, stashed away. Maybe someday I'll post them here...)

Kelly, Kelly, Kelly. What can I say. I'm so glad to be able to call you Friend! I'm also noticing that you need a label all your own here: I've written about you that much! (Like here)

Something else that you may not know about Kelly is that she is a direct marketing guru, with a special love for online marketing with social media expertise. Please go visit her blog, Directly Successful, or like on Facebook for great tips about using tools like Facebook to expand your business, or hire her to help your business explode!

(Kelly did not ask me to write this post. She's my friend, she's good at what she does, and Oh My Goodness that letter is funny!)

People of BlogHer '11

I've been doing this for a few years now... the following is a list of the people that I met (and exchanged cards with) at BlogHer in San Diego last week. It is by no means exhaustive. There are many people that I spent time with and didn't exchange cards with. Please also check out my lists from 09 and 10 for links to other great blogs and their writers that I've met in past years. If I forgot you here please leave a comment with a link to your blog so we can visit!

Kim from Mommy Knows

Kay from Buck$ome Boomer

Rhea from OhRheally

Kathleen from Life with Boys

Holly from CultureMom

Michelle from Honest and Truly

Melisa from Suburban Scrawl

Lynn at Walking With Scissors

Laura from Adventures in Juggling

Heather from Domestic Extraordinaire

Gwendomama

Lua from Miss Lulu Blogs

Megan from Sunshine Wonderland

Jean from Gluten Free Doctor

Careless Camper (Not what it sounds like!)

Brie from Capital Mom

Just One Miss

Kim from Crazy in Alabama

Karoli from Drums and Whistles

Renee from But Why Mommy

Aimee from Greeblemonkey

A special shout out to my roommates and suitemates: Liz, Christina, Shannon, Elizabeth and Jenn. And, of course, my BlogHer wouldn't have been complete without Carmen. I love you ladies more than you know. Now, can we go meet by the pool now?

Overdue

I'm finally finishing Pick Your Post Week.  Yes, like I said, long overdue.

Option 2: Headless Mom goes to Vegas!

My annual bowling trip was the first weekend in June. I had to miss it last year for the first time ever so I really wanted to make it this year. A few months ago when I started thinking about it I realized that Headless Dad would not be able to go with me because of baseball playoffs. Headless Girl was going to be getting ready to leave for Africa so she wouldn't be able to watch the boys or go with me. I asked my mom if she would be able to go but my brother was graduating with his Master's degree that weekend, and they were planning on going to the ceremony.

Enter panic. I really wanted to go but didn't necessarily want to go alone. I sent an email to my friend Kelly from HS with "Long Shot" in the subject line. I honestly didn't expect for her to be able to go but luckily she was.

I had to rent a car, and Kelly's flight got in early so I left reeeely early and arrived at the Vegas airport around 10 am. We headed straight to the strip to do some sightseeing and shopping!

We met a friend of hers for lunch and more shopping, and made it to our hotel around 4 for a much needed rest. (Getting up at 5 is not my thing. Really.) It was so fun to be able to relax, have some wine, and reconnect with an old friend, with no kids pulling on our attention or having to be anywhere.

We were able to sleep in before I made my way to the bowling center. (Which sucked by the way. I bowled terribly, thanks for not asking.) After that debacle, we decided to go shopping again, and walked the entire length of the strip, looking, chatting, and occasionally buying. (Sidenote: shopping is one way to actually save money in Vegas. I only bought a few things for the kids, and being out shopping meant that I wasn't feeding the machines in a casino. Win for me! Kelly isn't really a gambler so that helped.) We stopped for dinner at Il Fornaio in New York, New York; one of my all-time favorite restaurants, and had a great meal. (Mmmm, pasta.) After dinner we walked and shopped some more, (More!), and finally got in a cab back to our hotel to fall into bed.

Kelly's flight home left pretty early so we were up and out well before we wanted to be but it was a small price to pay for being able to hang out with her. It was honestly one of the best weekends for me in a long time. Maybe my DSSMD weekend?! I came home slightly tired, but refreshed and relaxed.

Thanks, Kelly, for a fantastic girl's weekend. Even if I can't turn photos.

No, I'm not 13.

If you're male, you may just move along. There is nothing for you to see here today... No offense. Seriously. Bye.

Most of you voted for Duh! You'd think I was 13 again in my Pick Your Story vote. Here ya go!

I think I got my period for the first time when I was around 12 or 13. It was kind of a non-event, really. If I remember correctly I was at a friend's house for a sleepover and started, used something of hers, and that was that. So, by that math, I've had a period for about 30 years now.

You'd think I'd be used to it? You'd think I would know what to do, right?

Ha! You'd be wrong.

When I was leaving for my trip last weekend I grabbed a small travel bag of 'feminine products' to throw in my bag 'just in case'. I didn't think I'd need them, but better safe than sorry, right? (This would be foreshadowing, right here.)

Kelly, one of my oldest and best friends, met me in Las Vegas for my bowling weekend. I picked her up at the airport and we headed for the strip to do some shopping. Later, we met a friend of hers for lunch and were walking around, shopping, chatting, and generally having fun. We ducked in to White House/Black Market to see what we could find. (Kelly and I are planning our 25th class reunion together and really need something cute to wear because of course, we have to look smashing!) As I was taking off my sundress to try something on, I gasped in horror. Yes, I had started my period.

And left all of my 'stuff' in the car, back at a hotel on the strip, about 5 miles away.

Helllllll-oooooo!

Honestly. Who does that? (Well, obviously I do. Not the point.) It's not like I'm new to this whole "being a woman" thing. I mean, yes, I have had issues with my periods for a few years now, and am firmly in the 'perimenupausal' category, (hot flashes and all! Aren't you glad you asked?), but really? How does one, at almost 43 years of age, 'forget' that one's period is coming? Or not know at.all.?

OK, well, in my defense, my periods have been highly irregular for the last few years. And with Headless Girl moving home a month ago, well, we all know how mixing hormones goes. And, when hormones mix, periods get horrendous.

So you know what's coming next, right? By the middle of the night I had awful cramps and was bleeding like a stuck pig. You're welcome. (Yet another side effect of the 'change'. Fun, I know. You young girls take note!) I actually had to change my underwear 3 times because of, um, problems. I haven't done that since... um, well, since I was 13 maybe? Sheesh. I even had to go buy more 'stuff' because I didn't end up having enough with me.

So yeah. Not 13. When will this be over? Soon, please!

PS- You'll be happy to know that I passed along the raging-hormone-luv to my good friend. Friends share everything, right? (Sorry, Kelly. I swear I would have kept them to myself if I could have.)

*****

Have you gotten your Shabby Apple discount code yet?

Five Fabulous Friends

Thanks to Trop50 for sponsoring my writing about fabulous bloggers. This year Trop50 is granting 50 Fabulous Wishes. Click here to enter for a chance to win $1,000 to celebrate a friend with a refreshing attitude about looking and feeling fabulous!


For years before I started blogging, I really felt alone. Not in the literal sense, but in the "I'm drowning in diapers" sense. Yes I had a few friends, but most of them were long distance, so getting together over coffee wasn't quite that easy! Once I found blogs, a whole world opened up to me that I only vaguely knew of. All of a sudden I was able to make connections all over the world, and commenting was a great way to stay connected, especially when I only had a few minutes to spare.

Me and Carmen, BlogHer '09

 The first blogger that ever responded to one of my comments was Carmen of Mom to the Screaming Masses. She was fabulous then, and continues to be fabulous. Through thick and thin our friendship has grown and she is one friend that I know I couldn't do without.

Busy Mom, JavaJenn, and Liz. Photo shamelessly stolen from Liz's Flickr. They may kill me for using this picture.

Amazingly, these three fabulous women have taken me in, (like I'm homeless or something?,) and I'm lucky to have them on my side, day in and day out.

Elizabeth writes at Busy Mom and we have bonded over our oldest children, (girls!,) and a wry sense of humor: she writes it and I laugh at her. She is my voice-of-reason sounding board; every girl needs that friend in the mix! We even went to the same university. Well, she was there a year after me, (long story,) but still! Same place!

Jenn is a tall glass of Texas Sweet Tea. We bonded over drinks at BlogHer '09 in San Fransisco in the wee hours of the morning on the front steps of the hotel. How many people can say that? She writes one of the oldest and most respected mommy blogs, Mommy Needs Coffee, and is always there to be supportive to me, and anyone close to her. I missed seeing her last summer and can't wait to see her this year.

Recently, Liz and I found out that we have one of those eerie, "what a small world" connections. Liz lives in New Jersey and I live in California, but apparently an entire country couldn't stop her niece and my daughter from going to the same high school and being on the cheerleading squad together. We only make fun of her "Joisey" accent because she lets us. Kinda. You can find Liz blogging at This Full House.

Stacey and Babynater at BlogHer '10. Photo by me.

The other fabulous thing that blogging has done for me is opened my eyes to things that I never would have seen, much less understood. Stacey of Is There Any Mommy Out There? is one of those writers that should be getting paid the BIG bucks. (Shouldn't we all?) She is informative, poigniant, and pee-your-pants funny. I've learned so much from her...mostly that no, I don't want a dog like Hampton Noodle.

Blogging has made my life infinitely more fabulous by introducing me to these amazing women. Who is on your Fabulous list?

Don't forget to enter the 50 Fabulous Wishes contest for a chance to win $1,000 to celebrate a friend with a refreshing attitude about looking and feeling fabulous. I was selected for this Tropicana Trop50 sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do. I received compensation to use and facilitate my post.